How Learning to Breathe Again Helps Women Heal from High-Functioning Anxiety
Chloë Bean, LMFT is a licensed somatic trauma therapist based in Los Angeles, specializing in anxiety, burnout, trauma, and nervous system healing for high-achieving women. Her work integrates somatic therapy, EMDR, and IFS to support lasting regulation, resilience, and relational healing.
Why Learning to Breathe Again Signals Safety to the Nervous System
Many high-achieving women live with a constant hum beneath the surface. Their lives look composed and successful, yet their bodies remain tense, alert, and exhausted. Even during rest, the nervous system keeps scanning for what is next.
High-functioning anxiety is not a lack of coping skills. It is a nervous system pattern shaped by chronic responsibility, pressure, and self-monitoring. Learning to breathe again in a regulated, intentional way can be one of the first signals of safety the body has felt in years.
From a somatic perspective, breathing is not about relaxation. It is about regulation.
In a recent Bustle feature on resonance-frequency breathing, I shared how intentional breathing can help regulate the nervous system and ease anxiety. But beyond the science, there’s something profound about learning to breathe again — not the shallow inhale we do while checking emails, but the kind of breath that tells the body: you’re safe now.
What Resonance- Frequency Breathing Is
Resonance-frequency breathing is a paced breathing technique shown to balance the autonomic nervous system and improve heart rate variability. Most nervous systems regulate best at a slower rhythm, often around five to seven breaths per minute.
This rhythm supports communication between the heart, lungs, and brain. When these systems synchronize, the body receives a clear signal that it can exit fight or flight and move into a state of calm alertness.
For women with high-functioning anxiety, this can feel unfamiliar but deeply relieving.
When you breathe this way, your heart and lungs start to synchronize. This gentle coherence signals your body to exit “fight-or-flight” and move toward a state of calm alertness.
Why High-Functioning Anxiety Lives in the Body
High-functioning anxiety often develops in women who learned early to stay capable, responsive, and composed under pressure. Over time, this pattern becomes embodied.
Common signs include:
Shallow or restricted breathing
Tightness in the chest, shoulders, or jaw
Difficulty resting even when exhausted
Feeling productive but never settled
These symptoms are not random. They are signals of a nervous system that has learned to stay prepared at all times.
When Anxiety Becomes a Habit of the Nervous System
Even when external stress decreases, the body may not register safety. The nervous system continues operating as if something still needs managing.
In somatic therapy, anxiety is approached as a learned pattern rather than a flaw to eliminate. Rapid heart rate, tight muscles, or shallow breath often reflect survival strategies such as over-responsibility, perfectionism, or people-pleasing that once helped you cope.
Healing begins when the body is invited to experience safety directly.
Talk therapy can bring awareness to anxious patterns, but the body often needs a direct invitation to participate. That’s where somatic approaches like Somatic Experiencing (SE), EMDR, and Internal Family Systems (IFS) come in. They bridge the gap between insight and sensation, allowing stored activation to discharge safely.
Breathing becomes a bridge: instead of forcing calm through logic, you breathe calm into being.
A Resonance Breathing Practice to Try
Find a quiet space. Sit or lie down comfortably.
Breathe in for a count of 5. Feel your belly gently expand.
Breathe out for a count of 5. Let the exhale soften your jaw and shoulders.
Continue for 5 minutes, noticing how your body responds rather than striving for “perfect” breathing.
It’s common for emotions to surface — relief, grief, even irritation. That’s your nervous system shifting gears.
Healing Isn’t Just About Slowing Down — It’s About Syncing Up
So many of my clients fear that slowing down means losing their edge. In reality, regulation restores clarity and energy. When the body feels safe, the mind stops working overtime to protect it.
You don’t have to earn rest through burnout or productivity. Sometimes healing begins with something as ordinary — and revolutionary — as a full breath.
Somatic Therapy for Anxiety in Los Angeles
As a Los Angeles–based somatic trauma therapist, I work with high-achieving women whose anxiety persists despite insight, success, or self-discipline.
Through somatic trauma therapy and nervous system–informed care, clients learn to regulate anxiety from the body up rather than managing symptoms from the mind down.
Learn more about somatic trauma therapy
If you feel anxious no matter how much you accomplish, your body may be asking for regulation rather than more effort.
To explore working together in Los Angeles or virtually across California, you are welcome to contact Chloë Bean, LMFT.
If that resonates, my free People Pleaser Workbook offers somatic prompts and reflection exercises to help you begin noticing where your body says “yes” when your heart means “no.”
Somatic Therapy & Breathwork: What You Might Wonder
What is resonance-frequency breathing?
Resonance-frequency breathing is a paced breathing technique, typically around five to seven breaths per minute, that helps balance the autonomic nervous system and improve heart rate variability. This rhythm supports communication between the heart, lungs, and brain, signaling safety to the body.
How does breathwork help calm anxiety?
Slow, rhythmic breathing activates the parasympathetic nervous system, often called the rest and digest response. This reduces physical stress reactions such as a racing heart, shallow breath, and muscle tension, helping the body move out of fight or flight.
What makes somatic therapy different from traditional talk therapy?
Somatic therapy works directly with the body and nervous system rather than focusing only on thoughts or insight. It helps process stress and trauma through body awareness, sensation, movement, and regulation, supporting deeper and more lasting change.
Is somatic therapy effective for high-functioning anxiety?
Yes. Somatic therapy is especially helpful for high-functioning anxiety because it addresses chronic nervous system activation beneath the surface. It helps women reconnect with their bodies, recognize stress cues earlier, and rebuild a felt sense of calm and safety from the inside out.